My Life in Business Suits, Hospital Gowns, and High Heels

This Book Is for You If…

✔ You want permission to embrace every part of you without self-rejection. 

✔ You want hope when life is hard. 

✔ You love memoirs that are real, vulnerable, and hope building, with lessons that stay with you. 

This book is a heart forward reminder that you can live fully in hard seasons and still choose hope, presence, and joy. 

The Courage to Be Fully You 

Book Review & Reflection by Lindsay Smith, LCSW

My Life in Business Suits, Hospital Gowns, and High Heels

by Tom LeNoble 

Mood of the Book:

Hopeful, Uplifting, Courageous

5 Gems to Fuel Growth…

Embrace all of you.

The shift I needed: You don’t become whole by perfecting yourself, you become whole by letting yourself be fully human without rejecting yourself.

For a long time, I tried to be a single, consistent version of me. The capable leader. The grounded therapist. The go-getter. The one who has it handled. But other parts of me kept tapping on the glass: the creative side that wants to play, the devoted friend and family member who melts into deep connection, the intuitive part that feels everything, and the human part that gets overwhelmed and just wants to rest.  

But the truth is: I don’t need to pick one and silence the others. When I give each part a little space, I feel more whole, and I show up with more ease. I can lead with clarity, then step into a moment with the people I love without feeling like I’m failing at being consistent. I can want big impact and still need quiet. I can be strong and still need support. 

Embracing all of me is not indulgent. It is honest. And it’s how I become grounded and stable. If you’ve been trying to force yourself into one “right” version, this is your permission to stop shrinking and start letting your whole self belong. 

You can’t be an imposter of you.

The shift I needed: Comparison shrinks us, but ownership of our lived experience makes us powerful in any room.

Imposter feelings love to appear right after a yes. A seat at a table, a new level of leadership, a room full of people who look effortlessly accomplished. I have walked into rooms lately and felt my mind start taking attendance: Who here is more experienced, more polished, more impressive. Then the old question: Do I really belong? 

I do. And it hit me when Tom said, “You can never be an imposter in your own life.” 

I did not borrow my voice. I earned it. Every hard season, every risk, every choice to keep growing built the exact perspective I carry into this room. The discomfort is not proof I’m unqualified. It’s proof I’m expanding. 

When doubt shows up, now I get to treat it like a growth signal, breathe, and contribute anyway. No one else has my exact combination of experience and heart. That is my edge. 

Stop postponing what matters.

The shift I needed: Stop living like time is guaranteed and start practicing love and presence today.

Life doesn’t give us a countdown clock for the moments that matter most. We think we have time, and then one day we realize how many conversations we rushed, how many goodbyes we treated like routine, how many people we assumed would always be there. 

So, I choose to practice love as something I say, not just something I feel. I tell my family and friends I love them when we hang up, when we walk out the door, when it would be easy to skip it because I’m distracted or in a hurry. As Tom reminds us, “Don’t ever wait to tell someone how much you love them.”  

And I’m seeking to practice presence the same way. When life is full, I still want to pause for the conversation and just be here. This morning, I sat down to begin working and my nephews popped by. I let the work wait. I chose to be fully present for the surprise visit and to embrace the moment. 

Stay anchored in who you are.

The shift I needed: Stress doesn’t get to decide how we show up; we get to choose who we want to be in each moment.

When everything around you feels uncertain, it’s easy to let the moment dictate who you are. The pressure rises, something breaks, plans change, and suddenly we’re reacting from frustration instead of intention. But the core of who you are, and who you want to become, does not disappear just because life gets hard. 

Tom’s words land so powerfully: “When everything has shifted around you and nothing seems certain, remember to hold on to yourself.”  

I am practicing that as a choice. The question is not, “How do I get the circumstances to cooperate?” The question is, “Who do I want to be while they’re not?” Just yesterday, technology was not working the way I needed, and I could feel myself getting flustered and sharp. It took longer than I would have liked, but eventually, I paused, recentered, and came back as me. Kinder. Calmer. More like the version of me I actually want to be. 

Choose your focus.

The shift I needed: We can be honest about our stressors, while still choosing a focus that keeps us rooted in gratitude, possibility, and what matters most.

There’s a difference between acknowledging what’s hard and letting the hard become the whole story. What if we told the truth about our reality without giving it the microphone? We can admit, this is stressful. This is hard. This is not what I would have chosen. And still ask, what’s the gift inside it? 

I’m practicing choosing my focus now. I’m still in the middle of a home renovation, and we’re putting in a pool I have dreamed about for years. Workers start early, the house feels unsettled, and quiet is not a thing right now. And this is also the life I prayed for. I live close to my nephews now and we get to make all kinds of special memories together. Gratitude does not erase the hard, but it changes how I live inside it. 

My 3 Core Ratings (1-5)

This memoir was a joy to read. I loved hearing Tom’s story and the way his perspective keeps expanding what feels possible. He is real, raw, vulnerable, and open, and I found myself smiling, reflecting, and rooting for him all the way through.

This isn’t a how-to book. It’s a life story, and that’s what makes the transformation so real. Tom models what it looks like to stay anchored in who you are, choose presence, and let mindset become a daily decision. His resilience through AIDS and cancer felt like a living testimony of hope and grit. 

When these lessons are top of mind, they are compelling to apply. The harder part for me is remembering them when life feels busy and demanding. This is the kind of book I’ll come back to when I need a quick recentering. It reminds me what matters, fast. 

Mic Drop Moment:

“You can’t be an imposter of yourself! Everything in your past has led you to this point.”

– Tom LeNoble

Notes, Nudges & Nuggets:

✔ If there’s a quiet part of you whispering that there’s “more,” treat it like an invitation, not a problem to talk yourself out of. 

✔ When it comes to your health and healing, be an active participant: ask questions, learn your options, and advocate for what your body needs. 

✔ Growth rarely moves in a straight line. If you feel yourself wobble or circle back, let that be part of the process, not proof you’re off track. 

✔ When you feel stuck in your own thoughts, shift your focus outward: connect, serve, help someone, and notice how quickly your heart softens again. 

✔ Protect your energy. Put your time and attention toward what you can influence, and practice releasing what you truly can’t. 

If you’re thinking about picking up this book—or doing any Amazon shopping—clicking through my link helps support future reviews at no extra cost to you. Thank you so much for your support!

Final Reflection:

We don’t have to wait until life is calm to live fully. We can be in the middle of the challenge and still choose presence, love, and the version of us we’re proud to be.

_________________________

Next time you’re feeling stressed, take a breath and ask, “Who do I want to be right now?” Then choose one tiny action that matches that answer.

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