The Big Five For Life
This Book Is for You If…
✔ You want every day to matter.
✔ You lead people and want their work to fuel their why.
✔ You’re ready to choose joy with intention, not by accident.
Reading this felt like someone handing me a compass
and saying, “You already know the way.”
Live On Purpose
Book Review & Reflection by Lindsay Smith, LCSW
The Big Five For Life
By John P. Strelecky
Mood of the Book:
Joyful, Encouraging, Practical
5 Gems to Fuel Growth…
Your purpose is your compass to joy.
The shift I needed: Determine your purpose, then let it guide your choices.
When I named my Purpose for Existing (PFE), life got clearer. My PFE, to live in joy—embodying it, radiating it, and inspiring it, became the lens for every decision. Instead of wrestling with big, vague questions, I simply asked: Does this choice move me toward joy? Will it help me embody, radiate, or inspire it? That filter changed my calendar and my choices. I turned down opportunities and invites that weren’t aligned and focused on things that were.
I determined my PFE by sitting with these two questions recommended by the author: “What would make me happy?” and “What would make me so fulfilled that at the end I would die feeling like I had lived to the fullest?” Those questions revealed what matters most and became my guiding light.
I also created a PFE for my business that aligns with my personal one: to empower people to live in joy from the deep knowing that they are lovable, valuable, and capable—so the hours I pour into my business also fulfill my personal purpose.
A PFE is a daily compass for attention, time, and joy. It doesn’t remove every challenge, but it keeps me aimed at what matters.
Create your definition of success through your Big Five For Life.
The shift I needed: Five clear life priorities turn purpose into a daily plan.
After clarifying our Purpose for Existing, we need a way to live it daily. That’s what the Big Five for Life gave me: “five things you most want to do, see, or experience before you die—so important that if you lived them, you’d look back and know your life was a success on your own terms.” These five things then become the filter for our time and energy, so success isn’t abstract anymore. It’s clear and doable.
My personal Big Five: BE JOY
B – Build deep, loving, and meaningful relationships.
E – Empower people to know they are lovable, valuable, and capable and to live from that truth.
J – Journey the world and experience the richness of its people, cultures, and flavors.
O – Optimize my life through continuous learning and growth.
Y – Yes to joy! Make a difference in the world by inspiring joy and a deeper love for life.
My company’s Big Five: LIGHT
L – Learn and grow with those we serve, evolving through every insight and shared experience.
I – Inspire lasting transformation by making personal growth accessible, practical, and joyful.
G – Guide healing from within to release unnecessary suffering.
H – Host experiences that spark joy and ignite a deeper love for life.
T – Transform 10 million lives by bringing joy, healing, hope, and connection into homes, workplaces, and communities across the world.
Because my company’s Big Five points in the same direction as my personal Big Five, I’m not splitting myself between life and business. I’m living one aligned story—I can feel it, and so can my team.
Your Big Five isn’t about doing more; it’s about doing what matters most and living a life you love, day in and day out.
When work advances people’s why, results and retention follow.
The shift I needed: Hire only when purposes align and the role advances the candidate’s Big Five for Life.
I used to think great hiring was mostly about skills and culture fit. Now I am aiming higher: hire people whose personal Purpose for Existing aligns with our company’s purpose, and ensure they can achieve their Big Five for Life through their daily responsibilities at work. When someone’s why points in the same direction as the organization’s why, they’re not just doing tasks, they’retraveling the same road—and their motivation lasts. Fulfillment rises, productivity follows, and people tend to stay because the job feeds their purpose.
This starts with clarity: candidates name their PFE and Big Five, we share ours, and together we map how daily responsibilities move those five forward. The author suggests making it visible—Big Five on the desk with links to the work—so purpose is part of every one-on-one, project, and promotion path.
As leaders, our work shapes people’s lives, not just our numbers. The goal is a place where people are paid to do what fulfills them, where we travel as peers toward a shared horizon—and profitability is the by-product of that alignment.
Manage by outcomes, not oversight.
The shift I needed: When purpose is truly aligned, you can trust your team—and they do their best work.
Early on, I tried to guarantee quality by watching everything. I rewrote emails, hovered in meetings, and checked progress like a hall monitor. The feedback stung, but it helped: great people do not need a chaperone. They do great work because it fits who they are, and they love doing it.
Now I’m seeking to hire for purpose fit, confirm the role will advance their Big Five for Life, and then set clear outcomes, boundaries, and check-ins. My job is to support, not hover. I use one-on-ones to remove roadblocks, not micromanage. If I feel compelled to drive someone to do the basics, I step back and ask: wrong person, or right person in the wrong seat?
The more I trust aligned people with clear goals, the better they perform—and the more I enjoy leading. My job is to set the destination, resource the journey, and appreciate the humans who choose to travel with me. That is how consistency and autonomy can live together.
Focus on what you want the end to look like.
The shift I needed: Identifying the desired outcome helps us show up with the right tone, focus, and follow-through.
I’m just starting to practice this, and already I can feel the shift. Before our family dinner this week, I paused to name the ending I wanted: deeper connection and everyone having fun. With that in mind, decisions became simple. Phones were put away. When one of the kids didn’t like the meal, it was easier to let it go. I asked one inviting question so everyone could share. A small intention at the start gave the night a clear direction. We laughed more, and I left feeling close to the people I love.
I’m excited about carrying this into both work and daily life. Before a meeting or a hard conversation, I can ask three simple questions: What outcome do I want by the end? How do I want to feel? How do I want others to feel?
When I can identify the outcome I desire, I can aim my time, tone, and actions toward it. That is how moments become the life I want.
My 3 Core Ratings (1-5)
Simple and story-driven, this was easy to read and genuinely uplifting. The ideas land fast and spark fun, hopeful conversations. I finished feeling lighter and energized to live with clearer purpose.
This shifted how I think, lead, and live. Naming my Purpose for Existing and my Big Five gave me daily focus and clarity that leaves me feeling more fulfilled each day—and it's reshaping how I hire and develop people. This clarity now guides my calendar, choices, and conversations.
Defining my PFE and Big Five took thoughtful time, and it was worth it. Once identified, they are easy to apply because every decision either advances them or it does not. That simple filter makes action feel joyful, clear, and sustainable.
Mic Drop Moment:
“Imagine…if you became a leader who created a place where people got paid to do the things
they like. A place people were proud to be part of because of what that place stood for.
A place where every day they felt like their efforts were meaningful and important.”
– John P. Strelecky
Notes, Nudges & Nuggets:
✔ Try a “museum day” check-in each morning. Ask: If today were on display in my life museum, would I be proud of what it shows? Let that guide how you spend your hours.
✔ Make your Big Five visible. Put them where you’ll see them (desk, phone lock screen) and link each one to a current project—so your day naturally pulls you toward what matters.
✔ Do an annual 10% cleanup. Nominate the most annoying, time-wasting tasks and eliminate or redesign them—like spring cleaning for your work and life.
✔ Learn from your “lovers.” Talk to the customers (or people) who use and love the most of what you offer; uncover why it works for them and scale those patterns.
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Final Reflection:
We create a life we love by naming what matters, aligning our days to it,
and letting our choices reflect our deepest why.
_________________________
Imagine the joy in your life if every day aligned with your purpose. What is one step you can take now?
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